Well, it's the Holiday season and because of my dodgy Winternet Connection, I've been slow to post, but looks like one of my poached signals is working this crispy, crunchy evening, so please allow me to define two (2) sets of two (2) words for you.First set is what I described to the wife of my recent employer (a terrific human who does incredible/wonderful work). You see, I tried to take a part time job just to keep on the straight and narrow. Stay off the streets as it were. Turns out I had to leave after just two weeks on accounta my boss's wife being a terminal headache/basket case on the premises.
Not having been in the workaday world for many years (or ever), our boss's wife either forgot or simply never knew the meaning of the words, "Micromanagement," or "Harassment." So I asked her if she'd allow me to define those two words to her (poor dear) before I walked out the door. That was my first attempt to return to the work world as a part timer, having firmly said goodbye to full time work (aka bust your butt above and beyond, and get very little in return aside from the occassional awkward attention from serial ass-slapper/TechSoup Global Co-CEO.
Now, there are two other words that have been on my mind of late (since February 2009 to be exact) -- Custard and Pudding. I got a chum/mate/Chelsea fan here what says he loves custard and pudding, but having grown up in London (or thereabouts), he doesn't realize that he doesn't know what custard and pudding are (poor dear).
Pudding is the familiar milk-based sweet similar in consistency with cream filling such as can be found in the Boston Cream Pie, and Custard is basically that same thing but can be served warm and has egg as main ingredient. In London (or thereabouts), one thinks one can over-egg the pudding, but in San Francisco all one can over-egg is the custard.
My matey on pudding -- "Pudding? Pudding's nothing but pudding. Pudding's pudding. Pudding's just pudding. There's Christmas pudding, plum pudding. You pour hot custard on it. It's pudding.
You have a glass of port on Christmas Eve. You actually reach the state of Nirvana. Afterwards, you don't want anything. You are completely happy, completely fulfilled.
"Pudding, in its original definition, is the weakness in buddhism.
"The 2nd noble truth says that suffering arrises from one's aversion to the cessation of pleasure. However, the facts speak otherwise. Because the consumption of Christmas pudding leaves one feeling totally satiated and lacking any other human desire or need (other than a nap or simply to carry on thinking about the having Christmas pudding. You don't want to think about anything else because there isn't anything else, Susan."
Yes. Alright. All crystal clear. Now just when I think I have a grip on what custard is I hear this definition in a voice growing ever more perturbable, "Custard's the stuff that you put on pudding. Everyone knows that. Everyone knows what custard is. Well, Americans. Americans have perverted the language so that it's no longer recognizable. The language obviously has been perverted. Witnesss the use of of the word "Quite." Who's he what's it --- uhhhh --- What's his whose it ---- Shakespeare, yes. Shakespeare said that "England is two countries divided by a popular language."
Indeed.
"Now, listen....luckily for The Beatles, they had been to Germany. After the war when the German were feeling very guilty, hence they sang in "American."
The Beatles understood that, put on tight suits and became huge pop stars. Important fact about The Beatles that not many people know, but which I, Professor Andrew James Goodwin (of course) am now able to reveal is that despite their enormous global success, and not withstanding the critical acclaim that was given them at every turn, it nonetheless remains the case that The Beatles, possibly as formerly stated, a group of some significance, never enjoyed the experience of having a Christmas number one*; unlike Sir Cliff Richard.
Still confused? Try this.
*This assertion has not been verified.
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